Hello Listeners. :)
It's not always easy to take your own advice.
It's not always easy to be the bigger person.
And it's certainly not always easy to retract on your inital reaction.
Now, this revelation didn't come as a result of chilling out, maxing, and relaxing all cool in a perfectly adorable coffee house (Shout Out to The Daily Grind!). This revelation came while a woman was sucking her lips and rolling her eyes at me in a manner that suggested that she was ready to throw me over her knee and give me a spanking. While treating me as an adolescent is never acceptable (especially in the first meeting), it is defintely unacceptable when you are really just looking for someone to hold responsible for your problem, someone to blame for your anger, and neither of of those "someone's" is me.
Now, nature's law would suggest that if you step on the lioness' tail, you've basically made the last intelligent (or lack thereof) choice you're going to make, because you're probably going to be cub chow within the next ten minutes, right? Do you ever think that the lioness wonders to herself, "Hmm. It was probably an accident. They really didn't mean to challenge my pride (no pun intended), disrespectfully infiltrate my territory, and try to demean my self-worth. They were just...upset."
Now yes, this is an extreme example, especially consdiering that I am not a lioness, but I do think both the fiereness and ferlessness of the lioness reside in the heart of a woman. There is the (almost frightening) animal instinct to protect her life and the life of her offspring and family, the chase and the queenly leadership behind the hunt, and the grace to live beside the leader of your pack without losing your own Alpha tendencies.
I wonder sometimes if integriry and self-wroth go hand-in-hand. My answer came when I decided to look up the meaning of "integrity." It's defined as both adherence to moral character AND as the state of being whole or undiminished. That sounds likes a "yes" to me. It's not simple to keep the roar under-wraps, but that doesn't mean that silence--rather submission is the only option.
See, I know many a lioness who not necessarily strike first, but are definintely silent defenders of her pack, watching quietly and dangerously, daring somone to disrespect her territory...and her demeanor is still as soft as a powderpuff and twice as gentle. She'll still cut you, though. ;)
It says a lot about character to want to cut someone with words or actions (or both lol) and choose not to, while still holing your integriry, not letting them make you one they should tread underfoot. As for me, be that in silence or otherwise, my worth is mine, and while some may have the audacity to challenge it, the right to tread it underfoot belongs to no one...not even the impatient.
*ROOOAR!*
Stay Fierce, Friends. ;)
From the Heart of the Poetress,
aM
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Thursday, December 1, 2011
If I Can't Sell It NOW, I'M NOT GOING TO SIT DOWN ON IT FOREVER, BUT I Still Won't Give It Away.
Hello Listeners. :)
I find that I let my mind wander quite a bit during my lunch break. I think of many things: people, places, nouns in general. Today, I inadvertently reminded myself of why I love to write. It's not just because I'm good at it. It's not just because I love to tell stories. It's not even because it's expected of me.
In truth, it's because writing is a part of me, and be there hurricane or drought, famine or feast, I always have writing as a haven. I've been blessed because I've had the privilege to have my go-to-haven cultivated by educators I admire as well as authors I've read. The latter are people that I may never meet (as most of them are either aged or dead), but whom have sent their private and public thoughts out into the world, like ships onto the sea.
So, why do I bring all of this up? Well, it's because my mind's eye reminded me of something today.
It is easy to doubt your gifts, to not see what everyone obviously sees in you,to discount your gifts' value. Moreover, it's almost more terrible to keep your gifts to yourself should you let doubt or hard knocks (some things ARE OUT OF our CONTROL) set in. Not giving all of you could be a combination of a few things: fear, bad timing, lack, no encouragement, whatever. But to keep your gift to yourself is like saying, "I have the pearl of great price....SHIIIINY...and I'm going to keep it as a make-believe hacky-sack because someone out there may not appreciate it as much as I do...or misuse/ damage it."
Sometimes I will try to write, and the personal obstacles in my day will make me go, "WHY CAN'T I PHRASE ANYTHING?!" It'll make me feel...it'll make me feel...
**sighs**
It'll make me feel, and that in and of itself may be the deal-maker, or the deal-breaker.
My Dad used to remind my family that feelings are fickle things, and while they are genuine, one moment can change a FEELING from being a 1 to being a 1000. So I'll FEEL, but if I don't move on from what I FEEL, my ideas, my talents, nee' my DESTINY may hang in the balance.
It's a blessing if you are surrounded with people who encourage you to be your best self, especially when you feel that goal is temporarily out of your reach . We all have up-and-down days and moments, but to doubt all of it, to let fear constrict and suck all of the life out of what you know in your core that you can do is to cheat yourself, to sit on your purpose, to deny someone else the privilege of having an example of being completely true to one's self. To set people free with your gift is not an option if you have the ability; it's an obligation to the nations . Be it music or numbers or the ability to smile so brightly that you turn someone's life around, don't let the roadblocks make you pass by YOUR opportunity to shine...especially in those moments when you have to shine while your heart is breaking. Keep pushing.
Yeah, that's what I thought about while I ate my chicken soup and oatmeal raisin cookie at The Daily Grind today...just in case you haven't heard from me in a while. ;)
Keeping the Faith and Keeping It Real,
aM
I find that I let my mind wander quite a bit during my lunch break. I think of many things: people, places, nouns in general. Today, I inadvertently reminded myself of why I love to write. It's not just because I'm good at it. It's not just because I love to tell stories. It's not even because it's expected of me.
In truth, it's because writing is a part of me, and be there hurricane or drought, famine or feast, I always have writing as a haven. I've been blessed because I've had the privilege to have my go-to-haven cultivated by educators I admire as well as authors I've read. The latter are people that I may never meet (as most of them are either aged or dead), but whom have sent their private and public thoughts out into the world, like ships onto the sea.
So, why do I bring all of this up? Well, it's because my mind's eye reminded me of something today.
It is easy to doubt your gifts, to not see what everyone obviously sees in you,to discount your gifts' value. Moreover, it's almost more terrible to keep your gifts to yourself should you let doubt or hard knocks (some things ARE OUT OF our CONTROL) set in. Not giving all of you could be a combination of a few things: fear, bad timing, lack, no encouragement, whatever. But to keep your gift to yourself is like saying, "I have the pearl of great price....SHIIIINY...and I'm going to keep it as a make-believe hacky-sack because someone out there may not appreciate it as much as I do...or misuse/ damage it."
Sometimes I will try to write, and the personal obstacles in my day will make me go, "WHY CAN'T I PHRASE ANYTHING?!" It'll make me feel...it'll make me feel...
**sighs**
It'll make me feel, and that in and of itself may be the deal-maker, or the deal-breaker.
My Dad used to remind my family that feelings are fickle things, and while they are genuine, one moment can change a FEELING from being a 1 to being a 1000. So I'll FEEL, but if I don't move on from what I FEEL, my ideas, my talents, nee' my DESTINY may hang in the balance.
It's a blessing if you are surrounded with people who encourage you to be your best self, especially when you feel that goal is temporarily out of your reach . We all have up-and-down days and moments, but to doubt all of it, to let fear constrict and suck all of the life out of what you know in your core that you can do is to cheat yourself, to sit on your purpose, to deny someone else the privilege of having an example of being completely true to one's self. To set people free with your gift is not an option if you have the ability; it's an obligation to the nations . Be it music or numbers or the ability to smile so brightly that you turn someone's life around, don't let the roadblocks make you pass by YOUR opportunity to shine...especially in those moments when you have to shine while your heart is breaking. Keep pushing.
Yeah, that's what I thought about while I ate my chicken soup and oatmeal raisin cookie at The Daily Grind today...just in case you haven't heard from me in a while. ;)
Keeping the Faith and Keeping It Real,
aM
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
No More Fear
Let it go.
Move on.
It’s okay to move on.
However, you have to talk about it.
(Hello Listeners.)
These are some of the lessons I’m learning as a writer. Going to the next phase is good, and being afraid of the unknown is normal. Actually, I think wanting to stay planted where you are is normal also, but it’s limiting. I don’t want to sound like some all-knowing life-guru who knows it all (I’ve not lived long enough; give me about 80 more years or so), but these are some of the lessons I’ve been learning as I’ve been living. And I’m not saying this based on some strict principle saying that 23-year-olds shouldn’t still be whining about taking out the trash or finding employment. There really is a lot of world to see, a lot of world beyond your personal world. The world is HUUUUUUUUGE and life is short.
Now, hold on. I’m not saying to go flying off by the seat of your pants (unless you want to. Hey! Adventure is waiting), but I think I’ve been afraid of all of the potential problems I could encounter.
For a while now (about five months or so (wow, it’s been that long)) I’ve been uncomfortable with the idea of moving forward. It scared me to go out into the real world. What if something bad happened? What if I couldn’t handle it? What would people think about my strengths?
What I’ve learned about myself recently is something about staying in the same
town with the same people serves its purpose, but if there isn’t any growth, things become stunted…and I’m 5’5! I’d very much like to be taller lol.
This is repetitive I know, but the whole idea of writing for the sake of publishing…or peace of mind…or helping someone else feel relief makes me feel like I have a purpose. Finding my own style is part of the fun, but it does determine a great deal once I've made up my mind. Choosing my path not only gets me started, but it pen-ultimately determines my life-story.
Yes, nothing is written in stone, but I think it was my mother who once mentioned that the decisions one makes between the ages of 16 and 25 are the ones that mold the life lived. Since turning 23 (and I'm sorry if this sounds a little morbid), I've began to realize how much time I've spent living, and how much time I do or don't have left. Every moment is gone before you even get the chance to think on it. The stories of the people who are both living and have gone on to their eternal resting place inspire me to make my own choices concerning what I do and what I write down.
Temple Grandin, a forward-thinking animal scientist, used a squeeze machine in order for her to find relief when hen she felt agitated or misunderstood or threatened or when she felt like no one would hear. That is what writing does for me.
So, here I am to tell the stories. My personal stories, the stories of my heroes, the stories of my friends and the stories of the people I admire from a distance. Maybe one day that’ll lead to people being healed or free. This is what I want; for people to be free of their pains and hurts and from the secrets that torture them all day and all night.
It's a new journey, and I'm finally ready to be excited to take it.
Keeping the Faith and Keeping It Real,
aM
Move on.
It’s okay to move on.
However, you have to talk about it.
(Hello Listeners.)
These are some of the lessons I’m learning as a writer. Going to the next phase is good, and being afraid of the unknown is normal. Actually, I think wanting to stay planted where you are is normal also, but it’s limiting. I don’t want to sound like some all-knowing life-guru who knows it all (I’ve not lived long enough; give me about 80 more years or so), but these are some of the lessons I’ve been learning as I’ve been living. And I’m not saying this based on some strict principle saying that 23-year-olds shouldn’t still be whining about taking out the trash or finding employment. There really is a lot of world to see, a lot of world beyond your personal world. The world is HUUUUUUUUGE and life is short.
Now, hold on. I’m not saying to go flying off by the seat of your pants (unless you want to. Hey! Adventure is waiting), but I think I’ve been afraid of all of the potential problems I could encounter.
For a while now (about five months or so (wow, it’s been that long)) I’ve been uncomfortable with the idea of moving forward. It scared me to go out into the real world. What if something bad happened? What if I couldn’t handle it? What would people think about my strengths?
What I’ve learned about myself recently is something about staying in the same
town with the same people serves its purpose, but if there isn’t any growth, things become stunted…and I’m 5’5! I’d very much like to be taller lol.
This is repetitive I know, but the whole idea of writing for the sake of publishing…or peace of mind…or helping someone else feel relief makes me feel like I have a purpose. Finding my own style is part of the fun, but it does determine a great deal once I've made up my mind. Choosing my path not only gets me started, but it pen-ultimately determines my life-story.
Yes, nothing is written in stone, but I think it was my mother who once mentioned that the decisions one makes between the ages of 16 and 25 are the ones that mold the life lived. Since turning 23 (and I'm sorry if this sounds a little morbid), I've began to realize how much time I've spent living, and how much time I do or don't have left. Every moment is gone before you even get the chance to think on it. The stories of the people who are both living and have gone on to their eternal resting place inspire me to make my own choices concerning what I do and what I write down.
Temple Grandin, a forward-thinking animal scientist, used a squeeze machine in order for her to find relief when hen she felt agitated or misunderstood or threatened or when she felt like no one would hear. That is what writing does for me.
So, here I am to tell the stories. My personal stories, the stories of my heroes, the stories of my friends and the stories of the people I admire from a distance. Maybe one day that’ll lead to people being healed or free. This is what I want; for people to be free of their pains and hurts and from the secrets that torture them all day and all night.
It's a new journey, and I'm finally ready to be excited to take it.
Keeping the Faith and Keeping It Real,
aM
Friday, August 12, 2011
The Help: Not a Misnomer
If a person chooses to be a writer, I hope they aren’t doing so for an easy ride (I say this with humor, of course). Sometimes, some people think putting a story together is an easy task, like baking a cake (and I’m sure someone can attest to the fact that even one-two-three cakes have their difficulties). However, even if it is innate to do so, telling a story isn't simple. Personally, I don't think writing fiction or nonfiction makes a difference concerning the complications of delivery. If the story is fiction, well, writing a story from one's own imagination is not easy to even think about. Hey, a story can be based on a place the reader has visited or…Hogwarts (again, more humor). Are the characters realistic? Does the plot make me care? Is the story trivial or not? Again, this is a skeletal view of idea so I’m not going to go into too many particulars.
Nonfiction is a little different. See, in fiction there is more liberty to elaborate or draw back or even tweak the “facts.” After all, they’re the writer’s facts. They are the master of ceremonies; what they say, goes. To me, nonfiction is about validity, truth, facts. Writing stories about events that have really happened make the writer have to do more homework concerning facts, truths, and the like.
Regardless of the genre, it is the responsibility of the writer to tell stories, even the ones that no one wants to talk about.
"The Help" taught me that.
I thought about which perspective to talk about the film I saw today. Should I talk about the historical, well…walls and hiccups that the struggles of the 1960s bring to the American forefront every once and a while? How the women and men in the theater today laughed and cried and gave the occasional “Mmm-hmm” in unison because something in those projections resonated with something on the inside of each of them? How “The Help” is not a film for everyone, especially if the truths we try to forget about are as ironic as the film that brings them to the forefront?
No.
I want to talk about Skeeter, the protagonist of “The Help”, and how she felt the responsibility of writing about something she strongly believed in.
Skeeter is an unmarried a 23-year-old recent college graduate who is trying to find her voice in the world, knocking on doors so that people would hear it and hoping that someone will say yes.
So am I.
She’s not too keen on the things she sees from day-to-day and knows that she has a (rather outspoken) opinion about them. She has stories to tell, and wants them to be heard.
Without going too much into the plot, Skeeter begins to write about the things that make her think, make her hurt. That’s when it got me to thinking about my own responsibilities as a writer. There are stories all around us. Matter of fact, if you just sit down and ask someone about themselves, you will have enough information for at least a full handwritten page (come on, I’m keeping it real here).
It got me to thinking about the stories that I want to tell, the things that I want to do, and the fears that I sometimes have about the possible repercussions that may come because of my actions. Here’s the key, though: it’s about telling truths in stories without being obnoxious (at least, that’s what I’d like my style to be like). I can tell you the truth and even make you laugh a bit without trying to break your soul.
This film reminded me that my stories are worth telling because everyone doesn’t come from where I do, even the people who live in my neighborhood. I think it was in “Spider-Man 2” where Dr. Otto Octavius talks to Peter Parker about intelligence being a responsibility to be used to aid mankind; a privilege, if you will. I think the writer has that same calling: to writer what I think in a manner that bespeaks the passion with which I believe it (Thank you, Taylor Mali).
So, until I sit down and write the specifics of my experiences with “The Help” (including a few of my weeping moments (yes, a few)), this is what I want the world to know I learned from this help.
So thanks, film makers, actors, and all of those who made “The Help” worth the ticket I paid for. You really helped me a lot.
Keeping the Faith and Keeping it Real,
aM
Nonfiction is a little different. See, in fiction there is more liberty to elaborate or draw back or even tweak the “facts.” After all, they’re the writer’s facts. They are the master of ceremonies; what they say, goes. To me, nonfiction is about validity, truth, facts. Writing stories about events that have really happened make the writer have to do more homework concerning facts, truths, and the like.
Regardless of the genre, it is the responsibility of the writer to tell stories, even the ones that no one wants to talk about.
"The Help" taught me that.
I thought about which perspective to talk about the film I saw today. Should I talk about the historical, well…walls and hiccups that the struggles of the 1960s bring to the American forefront every once and a while? How the women and men in the theater today laughed and cried and gave the occasional “Mmm-hmm” in unison because something in those projections resonated with something on the inside of each of them? How “The Help” is not a film for everyone, especially if the truths we try to forget about are as ironic as the film that brings them to the forefront?
No.
I want to talk about Skeeter, the protagonist of “The Help”, and how she felt the responsibility of writing about something she strongly believed in.
Skeeter is an unmarried a 23-year-old recent college graduate who is trying to find her voice in the world, knocking on doors so that people would hear it and hoping that someone will say yes.
So am I.
She’s not too keen on the things she sees from day-to-day and knows that she has a (rather outspoken) opinion about them. She has stories to tell, and wants them to be heard.
Without going too much into the plot, Skeeter begins to write about the things that make her think, make her hurt. That’s when it got me to thinking about my own responsibilities as a writer. There are stories all around us. Matter of fact, if you just sit down and ask someone about themselves, you will have enough information for at least a full handwritten page (come on, I’m keeping it real here).
It got me to thinking about the stories that I want to tell, the things that I want to do, and the fears that I sometimes have about the possible repercussions that may come because of my actions. Here’s the key, though: it’s about telling truths in stories without being obnoxious (at least, that’s what I’d like my style to be like). I can tell you the truth and even make you laugh a bit without trying to break your soul.
This film reminded me that my stories are worth telling because everyone doesn’t come from where I do, even the people who live in my neighborhood. I think it was in “Spider-Man 2” where Dr. Otto Octavius talks to Peter Parker about intelligence being a responsibility to be used to aid mankind; a privilege, if you will. I think the writer has that same calling: to writer what I think in a manner that bespeaks the passion with which I believe it (Thank you, Taylor Mali).
So, until I sit down and write the specifics of my experiences with “The Help” (including a few of my weeping moments (yes, a few)), this is what I want the world to know I learned from this help.
So thanks, film makers, actors, and all of those who made “The Help” worth the ticket I paid for. You really helped me a lot.
Keeping the Faith and Keeping it Real,
aM
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Being Hurt and Getting Through...
Hello Listeners.
The last week has been, for lack of a better word, difficult. I have experienced loss, betrayal, doubt,hurt and what seemed like attacks on every side. One particular experience left me feeling so raw and scarred, I almost lost my faith in the good of people...almost (stay with me). That experience alone was really enough, for my week, but life isn't always convenient. However, from a number of rather surprising sources, I've been covered and loved on in such an endearing way. So...just in case you're reading this and feel like you're losing everything, here are a few things I've learned this week.
1) (And hear me clearly, please) You...are not...alone, no matter what it feels like. There is someone who is always loving on you, even from a distance. In losing someone very close to me, it made me think about people who aren't necessarily in my inner circle, but who I see on a regular basis. So,even if you don't see a person on a regular basis, it doesn't mean you don't hold a special place in their heart of hearts. The world is a large place, and yes one is a lonely number, but there is always someone who loves you...no matter what.
2) (Since I mentioned solitude) In times like these, do NOT stay by yourself for too long. The mind is a tricky little organ, and...I'm pretty sure it was Friday that I stayed in my room and didn't mope per se, but just let my thoughts roam. When you are healing, it's not good to refrain from consistent trips to the doctor, so to speak, so you can heal properly. Besides, hearing from people who love you that it's okay kind of proves your mind wrong...so there!
3) When you are going through a painful season, know that it is just that: a season. From the outside, I know it may sound like I don't know how every person this relates to feels, and you may be right, but know that I'm still healing. Even today, after my mother and I had our weekly chat, she had to remind me that I got through the painful moment(s) that they are moments...seconds...hours...periods of time, and they won't last forever. It's good to have people snap you back into reality after circumstances can try to warp it. So get through this, because when you look back on it, you'll see just how far you've come and how strong you are because of all of this.
4) If you never hear the words, "I'm sorry," let it go. You have to, and that really isn't so much a suggestion but a, well, slight command. I once heard it said like this: "Choosing to not forgive someone is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to get sick." Here's a harsh reality: maybe the other person is relenting and hurting and feeling guilty, but there is a chance that they aren't thinking about how much pain you're feeling...and it sucks a lot. But if you've been seething for quite some time and you aren't making an effort to let it go, after a while all of that bitterness will drive you nuts. Healing takes time...lots of time. It may take tears and yelling and questions and the like, but there has to come a point where you have to let it go. It may not happen today or tomorrow, but it will come if you are making an effort.
5) (As an English Major, I kind of HAVE TO say this) Write. Skate. Dance. Get off of campus. Find something that brings you joy (AND IS HEALTHY) and do it. That being said however, don't use it as a means of running away from the issue. Get out your frustrations, but don't ignore the issue. Find people who enjoy you and enjoy them and heal. This is what this whole thing is about: healing.
6) Light comes. There is going to come a point where you're going to look back on this and (not necessarily laugh)it'll just be a wisp of a memory. It may not be the most pleasant thing to ponder, but it'll just be, again, a season to look back on.In talking to my mother today, she reminded me of a similar situation I went through when I was a little girl. When I was 11, I auditioned for a professional theater company in Philly that paid a good amount of money to perform (remember, I was 11! I'd be making my own cash...like real cash!). Now, up until this point, I'd nailed every audition I'd attended. So, when they told me no, I cried...FOR HOURS. I felt like my world had shattered. What's worse, my friend who came with me for support was asked to audition...and she MADE IT. My world was over! If anyone remembers Snapple Smoothies, that's what my mother bought me to calm me down lol. About a month or so after the audition, I received a letter from the company thanking me for taking the time out to audition (very generic) and I distinctly remember thinking, "Why was I so upset about all of this? I'm so over this! (really!)"
(Out of the mouths of babes lol!)
Finally...
7) (Something I did today) Write yourself a love letter...or love post-its.Let me explain this. When I was home this time last year (that's another post), I read in this book called It's Called a Break-Up Because It's Broken: Here's How to Fix It one way to heal. Get some post its and a mirror (or some place where you can look at them) and write down little reminders to yourself (i.e. "Let it go." or "Your friends love you." or "I am fearfully and wonderfully made."(oh, and be realistic. If you need to post, "He is gone and not coming back (hypothetically)" then do that. Write what is HEALTHY, encouraging, and works for you.))
So, these are a few of the things I learned this week/ had to be reminded of/ had to remind myself of. Many thanks to all of you (you know who you are) who were SO good to me and thanks be to God for covering me this week too! You can do it! I believe in you!
Keeping the Faith and Keeping it Real,
aM
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Going to the Chapel and We're...
Hello Listeners.
Recently, many of my friends have been getting engaged, married, and pregnant. Yes, this has been happening since I've arrived in college, but as I age, I realize that the people I hang with and love and call on a regular basis are finding their significant other a lot quicker than I remember.
I have been genuinely happy for all of my friends. I've rejoiced sincerely. I really feel great, but it does make me think about my own life.
As I was walking to my living space, humming "All By Myself" in my head, it hit me:
I think I've caught ring-by-spring-fever. Dang.
You may be wondering, "Why is this bad?" Well, first of all, I've always tried to avoid that stigma, as I've never felt that if I don't find my husband in college, he won't be found at all. On some subconscious level, I think I may feel bad that I've not an engagement ring on my hand...and that people kind of expect it from me by now.
Logically, I am not lonely, but alone. It really is a shame that more of us (myself included) don't appreciate this time in our lives. Think about it! This is probably going to be the most independent time of my life! It's like...for people who have regrets about not being married or having a significant other, it's like the ultimate forbidden fruit. It doesn't really matter what other trees are in the Garden of Singlehood; all we want is the Tree of Knowledge of Dating and Possible Marriage.
Hence, this is where the divide lies for me.
I have a feeling that, as with all phases of the heart, this too shall pass.
I've decided to be the Anti-Eve and not be tempted by the Forbidden Fruit and do the right thing this time. The rest of the Garden will have to do for now. :)
Keeping the Faith and Keeping it Real,
aM
Recently, many of my friends have been getting engaged, married, and pregnant. Yes, this has been happening since I've arrived in college, but as I age, I realize that the people I hang with and love and call on a regular basis are finding their significant other a lot quicker than I remember.
I have been genuinely happy for all of my friends. I've rejoiced sincerely. I really feel great, but it does make me think about my own life.
As I was walking to my living space, humming "All By Myself" in my head, it hit me:
I think I've caught ring-by-spring-fever. Dang.
You may be wondering, "Why is this bad?" Well, first of all, I've always tried to avoid that stigma, as I've never felt that if I don't find my husband in college, he won't be found at all. On some subconscious level, I think I may feel bad that I've not an engagement ring on my hand...and that people kind of expect it from me by now.
Logically, I am not lonely, but alone. It really is a shame that more of us (myself included) don't appreciate this time in our lives. Think about it! This is probably going to be the most independent time of my life! It's like...for people who have regrets about not being married or having a significant other, it's like the ultimate forbidden fruit. It doesn't really matter what other trees are in the Garden of Singlehood; all we want is the Tree of Knowledge of Dating and Possible Marriage.
Hence, this is where the divide lies for me.
I have a feeling that, as with all phases of the heart, this too shall pass.
I've decided to be the Anti-Eve and not be tempted by the Forbidden Fruit and do the right thing this time. The rest of the Garden will have to do for now. :)
Keeping the Faith and Keeping it Real,
aM
Thursday, January 13, 2011
She Was Only Nine...
Hello Listeners.
I'm sure you've all heard about the Tuscon, Arizona shootings by now. Anyway, despite the fact that all who died in this senseless tragedy lost their lives, the one victim that my heart still feels for would be the youngest one. Christina Taylor Green was nine years old, just on a visit to see government in action, when she was murdered by a man who would never hear about her dreams. She was killed by a man who didn't care about her future or her potential to do good in the world.
This isn't to belittle anyone else who was stolen from loved ones by this man. It's just...her story just makes my heart hurt just like the stories of those who lost their lives at Virginia Tech a few years ago.
One other thing that sticks out to me about all of this is the fame that the killer is getting. He has his own page on Wikipedia. He name now appears in Google searches automatically. People have probably seen his Youtube page more in the last month than in the last six. All he had to do was kill some people and put a woman in office in critical condition.
So, does that mean that if a person is too lazy to work towards fame, all they have to do is use a firearm so they can live in infamy?
It really isn't fair.
Her dreams are over, and his imfamy is just beginning.
It really breaks my heart, and my thoughts and prayers are with her family. Maybe one thing to remember is that loss is a reminder of how important life is. The people you see; the music you listen to; the things in life that make you happy and joyous and...free can't be taken for granted. So, live your life with purpose and reason and...joy.
If for no other reason, do it because Christina can't.
Keeping the Faith and Keeping it Real,
aM
I'm sure you've all heard about the Tuscon, Arizona shootings by now. Anyway, despite the fact that all who died in this senseless tragedy lost their lives, the one victim that my heart still feels for would be the youngest one. Christina Taylor Green was nine years old, just on a visit to see government in action, when she was murdered by a man who would never hear about her dreams. She was killed by a man who didn't care about her future or her potential to do good in the world.
This isn't to belittle anyone else who was stolen from loved ones by this man. It's just...her story just makes my heart hurt just like the stories of those who lost their lives at Virginia Tech a few years ago.
One other thing that sticks out to me about all of this is the fame that the killer is getting. He has his own page on Wikipedia. He name now appears in Google searches automatically. People have probably seen his Youtube page more in the last month than in the last six. All he had to do was kill some people and put a woman in office in critical condition.
So, does that mean that if a person is too lazy to work towards fame, all they have to do is use a firearm so they can live in infamy?
It really isn't fair.
Her dreams are over, and his imfamy is just beginning.
It really breaks my heart, and my thoughts and prayers are with her family. Maybe one thing to remember is that loss is a reminder of how important life is. The people you see; the music you listen to; the things in life that make you happy and joyous and...free can't be taken for granted. So, live your life with purpose and reason and...joy.
If for no other reason, do it because Christina can't.
Keeping the Faith and Keeping it Real,
aM
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